i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
only if we run a train.
done.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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