after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
