I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
