Don't you send me to vm
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
