i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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