the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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