I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
