no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
