Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I just had sex on a roof
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
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