We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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