I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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