Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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