we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
