Me too!
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Randomize
