i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
