Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
This is the high leading the old right now
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
