yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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