yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Randomize
