I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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