Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
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