you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
my being single is dangerous.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
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