You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
