On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
