I seem to have left my pride at pride
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Boobs speak an international language.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Randomize
