Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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