Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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