My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Randomize
