On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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