Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
