i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
