How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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