please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
