if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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