i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize