I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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