I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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