i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
that's an acceptable place to lick
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
