I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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