i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Just high enough for therapy.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
