I wanna bring you to show and tell
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
