Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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