OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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