apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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