are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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