im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
