i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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