Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
