On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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