What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize
