I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
